Saturday 14 July 2012

Journey to be Average... hmmm...

I am having Blog name regret--

I was so excited to get started on my blog that I was randomly typing in ideas until I finally found one that someone wasn't already using-- hmmm and the winner is....

"My Journey to be Average"..... ummm.....

The idea being this was, to be average in size- weight etc... 

In fact I strive to be more than average in almost every part of my life-- so I guess this is the one part that I would just be tickled pink to be Average at!! 

I have always been "above average" in kindergarden I was the girl who was always back row centre because I towered over all my class mates-  I looked like a 15 year old young women at the tender age of 11-- and my friends always seemed just soo jealous- all I wanted was to be able to fit into "kids clothing" and not have to shop in the women's section of the Sears catalogue!

There was a brief moment heading into high school that I was as close as I have ever been to being "average size" but that was short lived!!  Above average boobs, butt, legs etc.

I once begged my mother to order a tankini from the sears catalogue in grade 9-- a size 14 (I believe) -- I have never fit into it-- even at my lowest adult weights I have been hard pressed to even get it on over my boobs! I in fact still have it tucked in the back of my under ware drawer-- "just in case"! 

I am that person that when my co-workers start talking about how someone is SOooo over weight I just cringe for those magic works-- "Oh yah-- she has to be AT LEAST 250lbs..." with that disgusted OMG tone to their voice.   The few times that I have spoke up and said-- "I'm over 200lbs (over 250lbs really)" They look sheepishly at me and say "Well then you carry it well..."  Ok- sure!   

I work in health care and we have weight limits set for our equipment at 300lbs (this is old equipment- the newer machines now have a capacity of well over 600lbs to accommodate more patients no matter what size) When I ask a patient how much they weigh and they say 200lbs and they are 6ft tall and have a bigger belly than me-- I want to say-- no your not--- but then I realise that they are just saving themselves the embarrassment of having to admit that  they are not average-- that they are above average in one are of their lives that they never wanted to be above average in!!   

I am that girl who has that skinny friend who has never been over 10lbs overweight (if that)  that talks about a friend of a friend that she went to a concert with and she says "OMG she was SO big and her boobs- they where HUGE and hanging out everywhere"  and then I a picture of the person on facebook and realise that I would give my left ear to be their size and have the figure of that "SO big" girl!

I am that person that reads tweets from "skinny" "average" friends and am hurt because they don't realise how harsh their works can be " _ShitNobodySays: That fat chick has really nice boobs"  and I don't laugh....

It amazes me that people who have never lived in a body  that does not fit societies mould can pass judgement on people like me.   "Well just eat less- move more"  -- Yes I know this does actually work- but have you lived in a body that weights 260lbs?  Have you sustained an injury to you back- being told that your body will never be the same?  No didn't think so-- So please give me the courtesy and don't belittle my struggle with the task ahead of me-- I don't judge you because you have a closed mind on the issue.

I realise now that this has turned into a bit of a rant-- but these are things that I think about on a daily basis and it helps to write them down an think that someone may actually read them!

(fingers crossed someone reads this!! :o)


2 comments:

  1. it's ok to rant. This YOUR blog...YOUR feelings...If you feel like bitching one day then bitch! The next day may have sunshine and rainbows shooting out of your butt!

    I have felt the same way. I hate it when people start talking about "fat" people and I start pulling on my shirt and getting nervous. People just don't realize how their words, no matter the intent behind them can make other people feel.

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  2. Thank you!! I love that I have a follower!! and you commented too!! :o)

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